Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Shamoo wisdom

"Stop trying to be normal... Normalcy isn't something you achieve over time... you're either normal or you're not..."- Samia

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Catholic Fights to Have Church Lift Celibacy Rule

This is why Christianity has advanced and Islam is in the dark ages...
There is tolerance towards this woman... The Vatican didn't accept what she's doing, but they didn't accuse her of being a witch, and they didn't burn her alive (like they use to do.)
This lifelong Catholic realized that celibacy is a ridiculous and inhuman rule, and she's trying to change it. It is evident that more then half of the men that join priesthood have social and/or psychological issues... They find refuge in the accepting arms of Church, and become priests. (This is the half that end up molesting children.) The other half have a deep belief that they should follow the ways of Jesus to go to heaven... (What's funny is that no one really knows WHAT ARE the ways of Jesus... According to the Da Vinci code Jesus was married, for example)
Of course even if there was historical proof of this, the Catholic church wouldn't want to admit it, not only cause of the "Celibacy Scam" but also because it would mean that he was actually married by a Jewish Rabbi!) I think that would create quite a confusion for the poor souls trying to follow the path of
Ahhh, I can't believe people still follow all this nonsense... We are such slaves to any ancient text... We are The Slaves of the Scrolls (I like that... I'm on a roll today)
Maybe that should be the name of my first book!
Anyway... There will come a time, unfortunately long after I'm gone, when Christians/Muslims/Jews will no longer follow anything that the Vatican/Qura'an/Torah says, other then what falls under the universal laws of GOOD & BAD, which never needed to be clarified by a Book or Priests to begin with.
In other words, if the world still exists in 200 or 300 years, organized religion will no longer exist... It will only be remembered as a stage humanity had to pass thru in order to find true spirituality & wisdom... I find this article to be a step towards that.
(Note: Of course, what I wrote about priests, also applies to those who become "Shaikhs"... They both have social issues, but different kinds... Islam made a counter reaction to Christianity, by not only encouraging marriage/sex, but by increasing the number of
I'm pretty sure that most Christian priests back then yelled HALLELUIA when they heard THAT! A new rule fresh from Gabriel! Advocating marriage, sex, and a harem! Imagine how many quickly converted... It's a smart political move on prophet Mohammad's part... Especially since he also told them to reproduce like there's no tomorrow... Power in numbers... (Too bad he forgot to tell them that quantity shouldn't be on the expense quality.)

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Only the Truth shall set us Free

The Truth
The Truth
The Truth

One more death...

One more politician assassinated...
A murdered son...
A mourned husband...
A lost father...
Another funeral...
Another demonstration...
This can only go on for so long,
No, they can't kill them all...
No, he will not rest in peace if we don't find the killers
No, he doesn't have to be like Kennedy
Neither him
nor Hariri
nor Twaini
nor Kaseer
We CAN find the truth... Unless some of us don't want to

Saturday, November 04, 2006

1st lesson on the price of beauty...

I took my 3 year old daughter to get her ears pierced today...
She's been asking for earrings for the last few months... And if you know kids, clip ons just don't work for a girl her age.
I tried to prepare her psychologically for the pain so that she doesn't get shocked when she feels it, but I also didn't want to scare her...
People were telling me to pierce her ears when she was first born, to avoid this situation, but I refused. One, because i think newborn girls with earrings look like boys with earrings... I just don't like the look, to me it's kind of tacky... Two, and most importantly, because I thought it's too early for her to be in any real pain... I mean what's the hurry?
She chose pink studs, and we put her on a chair in front of a huge mirror (which I later found out was key.)
When the lady did her right ear, she jumped from the shock and started crying :(
Part of me felt guilty, I thought: is this really necessary? Why would I want to put a hole in my daughters perfect ears? But then again I remembered how much she wanted this... and how she constantly tries to wear my earrings at home, and gets very frustrated when she can't...
So I concealed my feelings, and just tried to calm her down, telling her to look in the mirror to see her new earring...
Now that she felt the pain I was worried that she's not gonna let the lady come near her again to do the left ear...
To my surprise, the female in her took over!
She was staring at herself in the mirror, and almost smiling cause she's loving her new pink earring, but also crying her eyes out...
Crying but not moving, and not trying to leave...
The lady went to the left ear, and at first Sara put her hand out, signaling to the lady to stay away... I stepped in: "Sara, we have to do the other ear now, look how pretty this one is, you will have another one on this ear too..." So she started crying more, but accepted! She let the lady put that gun to her ear again!
The lady was telling me that Sara was brave, and that most girls her age end up leaving with one earring cause they can't handle the pain...

On one hand I was proud of my brave girl :)
On the other hand I was wondering how much of it is bravery, and how much is vanity... Cause after all, it is the vanity gene that is pretty strong in my family, not the bravery gene :)

As we were leaving, I was carrying her, wiping her tears, kissing her, and telling her how pretty she looked... And I thought to myself: This is just the beginning...

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Winter is here...

1:00 A.M.
To start off my winter right, I changed my hair color back to red this week :)
It puts me in the right mood for the nippy days to come...
It rained all day today, and will again tomorrow... The heavy rain is attempting to wash the traces of war off the buildings and streets...
Yes, winter is here... So ofcourse i have a cold, and so does everyone i know :(
I guess this means i have to go shopping for winter clothes... ughhh
I glanced at store windows while driving today, and everything is GRAY this winter... sho el essa?
Is it the "in" color this season, or are the shop owners in Beirut depressed after the summer they had?
Yalla... Gray & red goes well together...

Sunday, October 22, 2006

For heathens this Ramadan...

It's against Muslim etiquette to ask people that you don't know if or why they don't fast (or pray), especially if your asking females... but ofcourse we don't live in a world that cares about manners... So people do ask these questions... Some ask to be judgmental and give you a lecture, and some are genuinely "concerned" about your spiritual well being...
Either way it's presumptuous...
So since it's not fun to just answer: I don't fast... And since sometimes you don't feel like having an elongated philosophical discussion about your believes... Here are 4 creative (yet quick) ways to answer people this Ramadan when they ask:
1- Q: Why are you not fasting?
A: Why are you fasting?
(My question is just as absurd as yours)
2- Q: Are you fasting?
A: I'm fasting verbally... During this Ramadan I will not speak negatively against any organized religion, it's rituals or those who follow it. (that's ALOT to give up for 30 days)
3- Q: Are you fasting?
A: No, I have my period.
(If you're a female, this is not meant as a lie, but rather to embarrass (or shock) the person asking the question. If you're a male, it will be taken as a joke and hopefully there will be some laughs and you can move on to another subject)
4- Q: Are you fasting?
A: No, cause I was told dehydration is not good for my hangover.
I've personally used the first two this year... And I actually applied #2.
If you have any new ways to answer these questions... please feel free to post them here :)
Ramadan Karim & Happy Eid

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Dream about me...

Click to listen while you read: Dream About Me
Oh, dream about me
Lie, on the phone to me
Tell me no truth
If it is bad
There's enough in my life
To make me so sad
Just dream about
Color fills our lives
Just dream about
Someone else tonight
Just dream about
Color fills our song
Just dream about
How I will let go

Saturday, October 14, 2006

I'm somewhere in China...

Actual location: Beirut, 3:00 a.m.

Sandlewood incense burning... lights are off...

Close your eyes and listen...

"There are nine million bicycles in Beijing

That's a fact,
It's a thing we can't deny
Like the fact that I will love you till I die..."

(Click to hear the entire song: Nine Million Bicycles)

Monday, October 02, 2006

The Seven Daughters of Eve

According to Bryan Sykes, (a leading authority on DNA and human evolution) there is a remarkable gene which passes undiluted from generation to generation through the maternal line. Therefore, everyone can trace their ancestry back to one of seven women, the Seven Daughters of Eve.
In his book "The Seven Daughters of Eve" he names them: Ursula, Xenia, Helena, Velda, Tara, Katrine, and Jasmine...

As I was reading about this book... I started imagining what these women looked like... What kind of lives did they lead...

I wonder which one is my "mom"...
I like the name Tara... Could she be my great great grandmother?
Which one do you think is yours?

How far are we from discovering the story of our origin?

According to DNA experts, we can answer the first 2 questions.

The 3rd question however, will remain unanswered for a long long time...

Wednesday, September 27, 2006


I should really stop listening to the news... Everything is driven by FEAR.
I refuse to be part of it...
Governments scaring people into submission... pushing them towards violence, and hate...
Americans fearing Muslims... Muslims fearing the Pope/Christians... and don't get me started on Israel & the Arabs.
I'm so sick & tired of Israelis (and their allies) starting every argument with the assumption that all Arabs want to destroy Israel! They use this to justify killing the innocent...
It is as preposterous as the perception on the Arab side that Israel’s aim is to take over the entire Middleast and fulfill the Zionist dream of a Greater Israel!!! OFFFFFFTTT... Arab leaders have been feeding us this BS for years so that they can stay in power... Each one claiming that he will protect the people from the big bad enemy Israel, while doing the exact opposite. These dictatorships are the reason Israel is this strong.
Each paranoid perception will just lead to more violence...
On top of it all, every now and then you get a Sheikh quoting the Qura'an saying that it's only "natural" to endlessly fight "Jews" since they are Gods forsaken people... lek 3aiiiiibbbbbb... 3aib 3alaikon... There are MANY Arab Jews that have nothing to do with Israel or Zionism... not to mention many European or even American Jews... Walaw? Where do they find these Sheikhs???
(What's funny is that these are the same guys that SCREAM when someone says the words Muslim & terrorist in the same sentence... They are the ones that say DON'T generalize and put us all in one basket... lol)
Anyway... The point is: The violence will not stop, until the fear stops...
A note to Syrians:
RELAX, Israel is very happy with the Asad regime... Israel has no interest in helping the U.S. change the regime to a democracy, cause "Elekhwaan" will be elected... and Israel would be screwed (just like they got screwed when the Palestinians elected Hamas) So don't worry... you are NOT the next Iraq. The U.S. is not gonna take out your dictator (atleast not now)... you kind of have to do that on your own if you wanna ride the democracy wave...

Monday, September 18, 2006


Now that i'm back to Beirut... i realized there are things i really missed, and didn't know it until i got here...
I’m soooo happy I finally:
-Slept in my bed
-Used my computer
-Drove my car listening to my favorite radio stations ♫
(while cursing at other drivers… now that I think about it, I haven't used any words starting with “kis…” the whole time I was in Saudi! Then again, I wasn't driving over there either)
-Went to my supermarket and bought my favorite foods :)
-Had a home cooked meal (not cooked by me of course, which makes it even better) lol I was eating at restaurants the entire time I was in Saudi…
-Hung out with my 2 favorite people in Lebanon and had a few drinks with them (finally... I got some “Munkar” in my system!) Of course, this is one of the things i KNEW i missed :)

What should we toast to? Peace? Love? Health? Happy returns?
maybe all of the above... (the cynical me: maybe we should drink to forget all about the above for the next 100 years!)

Cheers everyone!

Friday, September 15, 2006


2:30 P.M.

We returned to Lebanon on Wednesday JJJ
I was happy to see that the airport was packed J
There are many that returned like us, and are still returning just in time for the new school year...

On the flight, my husband and I didn’t really verbalize our feelings regarding our return, but Nassimo (my 5 year old son) pretty much summed it up… As we were landing, he looked outside the window and said (and I quote): "Hiiii Lebanon, I’m sorry I went away; I promise I won't leave you again…"

Monday, September 11, 2006

I ♥ NY

I never forgot... I love NY

Blaming the "Snake"... again

Today was not about “Evil”... Today, like always, was just about us... Us humans...
Yes, human beings just like us committed these acts in 2001. It wasn't the DEVIL OR GOD…
Blaming "Evil" is as absurd as celebrating & thanking God for "punishing" the “infidels”.

There is NO MYSTICAL BEING responsible for all this… It’s just us.
Once you accept this, you will suddenly have all the answers.

You who speak in the name of God, and you who talk about fighting “Evil” as if it’s some kind of outside force that can’t be controlled… Both of you need to rewrite your speeches and rethink your words.

Name things as they are…
Don't thank God, thank your apathy, due to the void in your brain & your lack of civility… Thank your obsession with death & an afterlife that made you cold enough to commit suicide & mass homicide… (And don’t forget to thank the aeronautical technology that made all this possible… The technology of the “infidels” you hypocrite)

The rest of you: It’s NOT “Evil” you need to fight, its spiritual deformity… If you want to be angry at something, be angry at thousands of years of organized brainwash & imposed convictions... Free yourself of the guilt of rejecting prehistoric and outdated philosophies... Speak against the unconditional surrender of our brain to the ancient written word.

You can burn candles & pray for miracles (as a form of therapy) but that will not erase that day, or prevent it from happening again… I assure you.

“I endured the hardships of labor to give you life… Such a hard gift to give, yet so easily & carelessly it was returned”- Leafless Eve on 9/11

Sunday, September 10, 2006

"Could you, would you with a goat?"

No, I'm not referring to a line in Dr. Seuss's "Green Eggs & Ham", i'm actually asking a question?!
I just read an article on BBC news... Apparently, Sudanese villagers forced a man to marry a goat after he was found having sex with it; the man also was required to pay the goat's owner 15,000 Sudanese dinars as dowry!!!
I love the last sentence: "let him pay a dowry for my goat because he used it as his wife" ?!?! LOL
Maybe the Sudanese "council of elders" do have a sense of humor, and they wanted to "punish" this guy by making him pay...
If not, then they must be really open minded... I mean they must have thought: Let's not try to judge the mans sexual preference... instead, let's accept it... live and let live......
So Bestiality is OK if you pay a dowry and get married...???
What? did you say Gays & Lesbians? WHAT? Homosexuality!??! NOW YOUR GOING TO FAR! Homosexuals are HEATHENS & SINNERS and not only are they not allowed to get married, but also must be PUNISHED!!! IT'S JUST NOT NATURAL!!!
And we all lived idiotically ever after...

Monday, September 04, 2006

Desert Time...

4:30 A.M.

There is nothing new with me... i'm just sleeping a lot during the day, and not sleeping at night... It's the bad habit that i picked up growing up in this country... It changed a little when i was away (for those who know me, u know it didn't change
So now that i'm here, it's back! and it's worst then ever (there are days when i don't sleep till 9 or 10 AM!)
Anyway, people here don't do anything before 3 p.m. cause it's so freekin hot so they are used to life after dark. They also don't sleep early... So the malls are open till 12am... The rush hour here is at 10pm!The other day we were driving back from a restaurant at 12am and the traffic was more then it was in the morning...
Growing up here, i'm able to adjust to this... But what i don't think i can adjust to (or maybe what i don't want to adjust to) is PRAYER TIMES...
I remember this when i lived here, but i never really went out shopping or did anything other then indoors stuff cause i was young... So i didn't feel it...I also haven't visited since 1997 (up until now... Thanks to Hizballa & Israel) Anyway, being here as a grown up...... Oh my God, i don't know how they function or run there businesses...???
The other day i left the compound and i wanted to make all my stops the same day... I figured the driver will stop, i will go down to each place and i will be done quickly... i stopped at the mall and as soon as i got in, it was prayer time... So i was looking around wondering what the best thing to do is (wearing my black veil & 3abayeh, looking absurd in a mall i don't know)... i realized no one left the mall, they all either: actually went to pray... Or sat in the coffee shop, or just walked around... but since i ain't PRAYING, and i'm not gonna sit in a coffee shop by myself, without being able to purchase a drink, i had to walk around for 1/2 hour, LOOKING at the windows, and WATCHING what i want to buy without being able to actually PURCHASE it!
A huge mall that costs God knows how much has to be stopped from sales 5 times a day! (4 times actually cause they are not open at Fajer) What a waist of time! there is no value for time here! The concept of time is money means nothing here...
I spent like an hour in the mall... when i was done i wanted to stop by the pharmacy, and guess what? it was PRAYER TIME AGAIN! i had to run in before they closed it, chose quickly and run back out.
I needed to stop one more time at the toy store cause i promised to get Nassim something, but i couldn't... it was already night time, and i had to head home for the kids...
So i told the driver to pick me up the next day at 12 noon, so i can go get what i need... and he says: but madam, it's prayer time at 12:30

I'm just gonna leave it at this... i'm not gonna go into the social/religious complaints that i have towards this (or anything else)... atleast not today :)

Saturday, September 02, 2006

"If you're going to San Franciscooooo... sure to wear some flowers in your hair... If you're going to San Francisco, You're gonna meet some gentle people there..."

I miss this songggg :(

It's been stuck in my head all dayyy...

i guess i miss dancing to it :(

i miss loud, crowded, and smoke filled spaces... I guess i miss

Love u allllll


Friday, September 01, 2006

The future of Romance...???

In one of my favorite movies "The end of the Affair" the main character is a writer... He said something that made me think: "Pain is easy to write. In pain, we're all drably individuals. But what can one write about happiness? "So it's easy to write about pain, because it inspires writers and makes them more "poetic".
It's not the state of bliss that writers talk about when telling us about a love story... It's rather the struggle and the pain BEFORE you reach the "Happily Ever After"... Love stories are rarely a description of how "happy" couples are.

So i started to think about love stories that I’ve read... and love songs that i grew up with... I noticed that they all had one thing in common: The sense of longing... the anxiousness of wanting to be with the person while you're apart...etc...
This NEED is i guess what inspired these writers, and they in turn shaped what we know about Romance...
In Arabic, the word i'm looking for is "Herman"... which kind of means deprivation...
(Herman is especially what inspired most of the Arabic love stories & poems I’ve read...) anyway....

Stories like Romeo & Juliet shaped the way we view "Romantic Love"...
Cinderellas Prince was so desperate to find her, that he resorted to her foot size as his guide!!!
"Romantic Love" is largely based on this struggle... it focuses on the suffering u endure when you're apart............ So i started to think about what technology changed when it comes to Love.
In the old days, you couldn't email each other or talk on the cell when you miss each other...
If lovers were apart, they would have to send letters with couriers, or with pigeons! and that took forever! so they were forever in pain and forever thinking and longing, until one of them dies! (and one of them always died cause no disease had a cure in the old

So all that brought me to thinking about the future of relationships... and the future of Romance...

What's interesting is that we (our generation) lived in that world (to a certain extent)
Ok, we weren't using pigeons to communicate, but i remember having to wait by the HOUSE PHONE while my parents are asleep so i can have a private conversation with a boy! The process of getting to know the other person took forever cause you couldn't reach them all the time... Especially if you have conservative parents, or if you were living in a gossipy my-big-fat-greek-wedding style environment...
In those days, there was much more distance, so there was more time spent on missing the person then actually being in touch with them.... so every "crush" and every relationship had a slow pace... Not being so reachable kept that "spark" and made relationships last longer.

We don't live in that world anymore!

Our children will never experience this... they will always be a touch of a button away from those they want to reach...
Relationships have become very quick... they start and they end in a glimpse!
Sometimes i observe my single friends and i think: "Going fast is probably a good thing cause who has time to waist... no one is getting any younger...etc..."
but then again: Are couples becoming so close so fast, that there is no where else for the relationship to go but downhill?

Fast food, fast lives, and fast Romances...

And when you have just started dating, why wait for Saturday night to show off your new hair style, when u can email your boyfriend your new look as soon as you leave the hairdresser?
Why does he have to wait till he sleeps over to see you in your nightgown when u have a webcam in yourbedroom... right in front of your bed......... u can see where i'm going with this......

So how much room is there for desire???
Longing to hear the persons voice, for example, no longer exists... cause even if u don't call each other, u can always leave voice messages!
How much can u really miss a person if u have there picture on your MSN and your mobile and your desktop???
There is no waiting for scented letters to arrive in your mailbox... Instead, there are emails, most of them short...... You might never know what your boyfriends/girlfriends handwriting ever looks like?!? lol
Even flowers & chocolates have become virtual...

I was thinking about what my kids will say when i tell them that i grew up without a computer!? (and without the Internet! and without Satellite TV?!)
Definitely when considering the educational & informative aspects, they would feel bad for me and my generation, cause they have and advantage that we never had when we needed to do research, or when we wanted to know more about the world...etc........... but when it comes to Romance, i wonder if they would pity us, or envy us?

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